From: The Washington Post
How to Complain Better and Strengthen Relationships
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Marital researcher John M. Gottman found that even in successful long-term relationships, 69 percent of conflicts remain unresolved due to fundamental differences in personality, lifestyle preferences or values. Rather than seeking a “fix,” strive for mutual understanding in common areas of conflict like sexual desire, parenting, finances, housework and time spent with others.
Gottman also found that ongoing expressions of respect, humor and affection are essential to a happy relationship. Feeling understood means being willing to listen without being reactive, defensive or critical. No small feat, but the benefits are huge. As the saying goes, “Before you say you don’t feel heard, consider how well you listen.”
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