Ghosting is Usually a Terrible Thing To Do. Here’s When It’s OK

You’re hitting it off with a new fling or friend when suddenly, they drop off the face of Earth without warning and with absolutely no explanation. You then realize you’ve been ghosted, perhaps vowing to never treat anyone how you were treated.

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On dating apps, ghosting can be a simple and efficient way to end one of multiple connections someone is simultaneously entertaining, said Dr. Rich Slatcher, a professor of psychology at the University of Georgia. The more anonymous someone is, the easier it is to dehumanize them, he said, and how much we owe someone, especially in the early stages, isn’t a universally agreed-upon concept.

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If you tend to ghost for this reason, you’re likely avoiding conflict in other areas of your life, Slatcher said. Working with a therapist can help you overcome this habit.

The decision to ghost another person isn’t always consciously made — sometimes, people just mentally cast aside the issue in their mind because they don’t feel like dealing with it at the time, then end up never responding. “Some people are just terrible at responding on text and just can’t get their act together,” Slatcher said.

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